As adults, we speak in stories at work, at family get-togethers, at class reunions, at town meetings, at the post office when we meet our neighbors. In fact, stories are such an important medium for us that even the numerous stories we tell and hear daily are not enough to satisfy our enormous appetites–we consume additional stories by reading novels, seeing movies, and watching dramas on television.

Have you asked yourself why we tell stories—and listen them?

1) Obviously, stories entertain us, but our need to be entertained doesn’t fully account for our great hunger for stories, why we tell stories.

2) A more satisfying explanation of the power stories hold for us is that they provide rehearsals for life: they furnish us with the reassurance and the guidance we need to become adults who live full, happy lives. We read novels or watch movies for the same reason we tell stories: we want both reassurance that we can succeed in this journey called life and the guidance to do so. We want to see and hear how others have been successful in the struggles of their lives. We want to know the meaning of the decisions they took: did finishing school afford them a better job? was putting off marriage a sensible thing to do? what were the consequences of following or deviating from the patterns their families had set for them? Answering these questions is one reason why we tell stories.

3) We want stories to reassure us that the inner strength we can muster will be sufficient against self-doubt, loss, grief, and disappointment. (People may exaggerate in their stories not to aggrandize themselves or to boast, but to rehearse the strength and meaning that may be missing in their lives and, by doing so, to acquire the strength and meaning they need.) It’s not out of idle curiosity that your children and grandchildren want to know about you and your life. What is more natural than for them to turn to the stories of their own parents and family for reassurance and guidance? Your stories have this power and, if they are preserved, they can offer meaning and direction for your children and grandchildren—just as they can for you.

When you tell your personal and family stories—that is, write memoir, you are filling a need that exists not only in your family but in the larger human community to receive reassurance and guidance. Every year, as more and more once-tightly-knit groups in our society unravel and our access to our rightful inheritance of family stories is threatened, telling and writing your stories becomes increasingly important.

And that’s why we tell stories!

Good luck telling your stories!

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Would working with a memoir-writing coach help you to stay motivated?