Be a Better Memoir Writer with Deliberate Practice
We all wear many hats as we go through our days. In my case, I am a writer, a memoirist, a teacher, a memoir coach, a memoir editor, a co-author, a book publisher, and finally, a small business person. I wear those hats with pride and, I hope, some accomplishment.
Beyond these, I wear other hats as all of you do also. One is that of an athlete of sorts: there has been swimming, jogging, and weight lifting. In this post, want to focus on how I worked on my physical conditioning through deliberate practice and then apply that to memoir writing.
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Your writing is your work–Schedule first your time for writing
To make time for writing, you have to be serious about the principle that your writing is your work. You must act on it and take it as seriously as your paying job.
This is low-hanging fruit for time management: honor your writing schedule!
You do not show up at your work when you feel like it—nor do you write only when the feeling comes over you!
If you are working as a nurse or a therapist or a business office administrator or whatnot, you do not show up at your work when you feel like it or when you are inspired. You have certain hours whether you work full-time or part-time during which you are expected to show up at the job. The same is true of your writing. You show up for your writing schedule.
If you write when you “get to it,” when you “feel like it,” when inspiration moves you, you will likely do little writing and almost certainly not complete a book of memoirs. If you were being paid for this memoir “job,” your boss would fire you. [Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]
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10 Ways to Stop Writer’s Block
Why should writers have writer’s blocks? Do plumbers have plumber’s block? Do accountants have accountant’s block?
A block is simply a failure of process. A plumber lines up his pipes and couplings and begins to work. And an accountant takes her spreadsheets out and begins to analyze them.
Ways to Stop Writer’s Block
In the case of a writer, it is a failure of a writerly process or a professional approach to one’s work that gets dignified with the name of “writer’s block”.
I’m not one to give much credence to “writer’s block.”
I’ll grant that there are times when the “muse” seems to be absent and has wandered off someplace else, but you can draw the muse back by strategic inducements.
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12 Reasons People Quit Writing a Memoir
I have been asking myself what are the reasons people quit writing a memoir and how to help them persevere. I have drawn the following list from my experience with the people who have begun to work with me and then stopped writing.
The answers to why people quit are so varied! Here are some I have come up with as I have pondered the topic. Below is a list that contains both very valid reasons and some that I consider simply wimpy. If you find yourself harboring feelings that I bring up as triggers for quitting, I hope you will address them before they take hold of you.
Reasons people quit writing a memoir
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9 Tips for a Fast Start Writing Your Memoir
Ever wish you had the secret of generating a fast way to fast start writing your memoir—or most any other book?
A proven way to start writing is to follow a set of steps that will help you get into the writing habit. When I wrote and published A Sugary Frosting / A Memoir Of A Girlhood Spent in a Parsonage, I appreciated the efficiency and effectiveness of my writing process all the more. A Sugary Frosting is the story of the first 20 years of my deceased wife’s life. She had written a number of her stories but died before completing a memoir. When I took up the task, I followed what I consider to be “best practices” of memoir writing.
Below I offer them to you to help you get a fast start and to write more prolifically—and even bring it to a finish in the form of a published memoir.
Here are my nine “best practices” for memoir writing. They are tried and true and bear implementing today.
1. Set up a regular writing time. This will get you a fast start writing your memoir.
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22 Memoir-Writing Goals to Jumpstart your Memoir Writing
Do you find yourself wandering along with your memoir writing and not achieving your memoir-writing goals? Do you have a sense that you might have accomplished a bit more writing than you have?
At regular intervals, it is traditional to review how the past went for you and to recommit to goals for yourself for the coming months. (A goal is a wish with action steps and a timeline.) These goals need to be written and reviewed periodically.
Studies have shown that people who set goals in writing have a better outcome vis-à-vis accomplishing what they set out to do. Here’s a report on one such study. (The famous Harvard goal-setting study so many of us have heard of apparently never happened, but the concept of goal setting is clearly important and is explored in the linked article.)
22 Memoir-Writing Goals especially for you!
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What would support for writing your memoir look like for you?
While some people succeed at writing an interesting and meaningful memoir on their own, the fact is many people need both more technical expertise than they now have and more emotional support for the long effort they are undertaking. Many find the task of writing a memoir—however urgent and compelling—to be somewhat daunting and, if […]
Surviving Childhood Abuse: A Writer’s Experience
Congratulations to Denise Brown on the publication of her book, Transcending Darkness: A Memoir of Abuse and Grace. I recently had the opportunity to interview Denise about her experience writing her book on surviving childhood abuse. I am pleased to share her experience. To read Part 2, click here. To read Part 3, click here.—DL
Denis Ledoux: Can you tell our readers what your book is about and why you were impelled to write it? What was driving you to spend the time, energy and money to get this book out into the world?
Denise Brown: Transcending Darkness is a memoir about the abuse that I experienced during my childhood. Abuse led me on a path of self-destruction. This path encountered God and his mercy in unexpected ways. It sounds like a crazy story, but I began writing my memoir when I was in college after having an incredible dream. An angel brought me to visit three teenage girls who were suffering emotionally. Each of them had been reading a book and were crying. I realized that the book was giving them a glimmer of hope for their futures. Then the angel revealed to me that it was my book that I had not yet written that they were reading, and that I was being given the choice of helping them or not. After that, I couldn’t get the dream out of my head! I began writing what would become Transcending Darkness a few days later.
DL: Can you tell us how long it took from the time you conceived the book to the time you had it published? How many years did you spend in active writing? Were there long breaks in between active writing periods? If so, what happened to get you writing again? Writing about surviving childhood abuse must have been difficult. emotionally
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Writing Memoir Is Not Easy
When you’re writing memoir, the project typically starts with a burst of energy. “This is going to be a good piece of writing! What am I saying, ‘good?’
“It’s going to be great!”
So we write for a month or two or even three and the energy remains strong but…
There comes a day when the demon that plagues all writers raises its ugly head and snaps at you.
“What in the world were you thinking of committing yourself to writing this horribly insignificant piece! And worse yet, what were you thinking of alerting other people that you were writing a memoir? Now, they’re going to expect something and you’re about to make a fool of yourself!”
Or, something equally terrible and intimidating goes through your mind. When that happens, what do you do?
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