“I don’t have much of a sense that I’m on the way to finishing my memoir,” you lament, “other than to just stop writing.”
This category addresses how you can bring your memoir to a close so that it is both complete and satisfying.
This is not, of course, a question you ask yourself as you begin your memoir, but there comes a time in the process when it becomes obvious to you that you have written your story and it’s now time to wrap it up.
A process of open and close
On this blog, there are many posts that advocate lingering with your writing and with taking the time it takes. The process of writing is usually not best done when it is rushed. Keep your writing options open. The advice to linger is good because too many memoirs are ruined by a “rush job.” But…
The opposite of lingering is also true. You must focus on finishing your memoir—or else you can continue to write for years to come. Writing is great and you must respect the process, but you also need to move on to your next memoir—or to the rest of your life—at some point. You have to bring the process to a close, write to the end and then publish your book.
In conclusion
The posts below both help you to assess when it is time to finish your memoir and also provides techniques for you to arrive at a satisfying conclusion.
If you are sincere about finishing your memoir, the posts below will suggest a number of “rules” to follow to expedite the matter.
Another memoir finished: what was the writing process?
Writers can doubt their process. This is understandable as writing a memoir is a long undertaking that can—and usually does—have many discouraging moments.
Monday Focus: “Commit to staying the course.”
Your commitment to writing your memoir must be ongoing. Today, I’m offering tactics to help sustain your motivation to finish your memoir.
Showing up for my memoir– again!
DL: This is a reprint of a post that appeared in September of 2022. It strikes me as pertinent for many readers of The Lifewriter’s Digest. The final publication of French Boy took another year. I republish this both to present a proven process and to own that I have my challenges, too. I’m not […]
Use Time Wisely to Write Your Memoir
Use time wisely to write your memoir. Writing is important and you have less time than you think you do.
When Writers Lose Interest, It Might Actually Be Healthy
It’s common for a writer to find that she has written much about a period of her life that is now uninteresting to her. Though she wrote with enthusiasm, intending to include this material in her memoir, it doesn’t seem to merit inclusion now. She may be despondent. “I worked so hard! Now I want to leave this out! Is this going to happen with everything I write?” Why do writers lose interest in parts of their memoir.
I’ve heard clients express this frustration and I’ve also experienced it myself. What’s up?
I believe the writer who now finds some of his material no longer of interest to him has accomplished an inner goal and has produced a good piece of healing writing. He is now free of the material’s emotional intensity and no longer needs to give it attention.
[Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]
We'd love to have you access this content. It's in our members-only area, but you're in luck: becoming a member is easy and it's free.
Already a Member?
Not a Member Yet?
12 Reasons People Quit Writing a Memoir
I have been asking myself what are the reasons people quit writing a memoir and how to help them persevere. I have drawn the following list from my experience with the people who have begun to work with me and then stopped writing.
The answers to why people quit are so varied! Here are some I have come up with as I have pondered the topic. Below is a list that contains both very valid reasons and some that I consider simply wimpy. If you find yourself harboring feelings that I bring up as triggers for quitting, I hope you will address them before they take hold of you.
Reasons people quit writing a memoir
[Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]
We'd love to have you access this content. It's in our members-only area, but you're in luck: becoming a member is easy and it's free.
Already a Member?
Not a Member Yet?
Beginning the End Stage Before Publication
Last week, I realized I needed to acknowledge to myself that I was in the end stage before publication of writing my memoir. For one thing, I finally came up with a name—French Boy / Growing Up Franco-American—that I’m likely to keep. (So many titles in the trash!) This title reveals the content of the memoir—a good title has to position a book for its audience. A good title says: “This book is for you.”
My natural audience
Since I am a self-publisher, I am super aware of audience. While I believe that anyone might enjoy reading French Boy—do I flatter myself that it is insightful in presenting its theme?—but I know its natural audience is the Franco-American (francophone Canadian-American) who grew up in the mid-century. That is the person who will go on a search for such a book. That person will say, “I’ve been waiting for French Boy.”
That audience has searched for my mother’s memoir, We Were Not Spoiled, and has downloaded it several thousand times. I find that incredible that so many people have downloaded the life of an ordinary (albeit lovely) woman whose memoir spans the years 1921 to 1952. (I stopped the story in 1952 and then picked up the thread in French Boy.)
The readers for my own memoir are largely the same and so I am confident about reaching them. While I hope many, many different people will want to read my memoir, I don’t want to take my natural audience for granted. [Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]
We'd love to have you access this content. It's in our members-only area, but you're in luck: becoming a member is easy and it's free.
Already a Member?
Not a Member Yet?
How Long Does It Take to Write a Memoir?
Sometimes, years after I’ve heard from someone that he is writing a memoir, I will hear from the writer again. Perhaps it’s three or four or five years later, but the writer is working on the same memoir and is not close to finishing. I don’t get it. How long does it take to write a memoir? So I ask politely, “What has snagged your memoir?” In short…
It seems to have taken that writer too long to write his memoir!
So, how long does it take to write a memoir?
Well, I don’t actually know the answer to “how long does it take to write a memoir?” What I know is a memoir needn’t take so long to compose as many people take. People do get bogged down in writing. A memoir—an interesting and meaningful one under 200 pages—can be written in as short a time as 12 to 24 months.
If that’s so, then why do some memoirs drag on and on and risk never getting completed?
Sometimes, years after I’ve heard from someone that he is writing a memoir, I will connect with the writer again. Perhaps it’s three or four or five years later, but the writer is working on the same memoir. I don’t get it. So I ask politely, “What has snagged the memoir?” In short…
I has taken that writer too long to write his memoir!
How long does it take to write a memoir?
Well, I don’t actually know the answer to “how long does it take to write a memoir?” What I know is a memoir needn’t take so long to compose. A memoir—and interesting and meaningful one—can be written in 12 to 24 months.
If that’s so, then why do some memoirs drag on? [Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]
We'd love to have you access this content. It's in our members-only area, but you're in luck: becoming a member is easy and it's free.
Already a Member?
Not a Member Yet?
How to write the last chapter of a memoir
“How do I write the last chapter of a memoir?” coaching and editing clients will sometimes ask me.
It is a good question because the last chapter of a memoir is your final shot at affirming your theme and at creating a satisfying and meaningful ending to the story the reader has been engaged in for perhaps 200 or 300 pages—or even more.
Revising the last chapter is also something I have been working with on my childhood memoir—which, alas, is still nameless.
As I write this
For a while now, I have been contributing to the text of the second half of my memoir, and the text has become a bit rambling. Without much awareness that I was doing this, I filled it with vignettes—my “little darlings” as many writers refer to these vignettes—I had forgotten to include elsewhere. Some of them are going to have to submit the fate that writers refer to as “killing their little darlings.”
[Free Membership required to read more. See below. ]