We all know how important a precise and varied vocabulary is to our memoir writing. Words are our tools to make meaning. Most of the writers I have worked with want to develop the precise and varied vocabulary that can be so helpful in writing narrative. Unfortunately, they also believe that an extensive vocabulary is […]

We all know how important a precise and varied vocabulary is to our memoir writing. Words are our tools to make meaning. Most of the writers I have worked with want to develop the precise and varied vocabulary that can be so helpful in writing narrative. Unfortunately, they also believe that an extensive vocabulary is called for in dialog tags.

I’m offering you may “take” on dialog tags. The point of view I am presenting today is open to discussion. Sometimes I disagree with it myself, but here goes…

[to see this as a YouTube video, click here.]

By the way, in case you are not sure of what a dialog tag is, tags are phrases that you attach to written conversation to identify who is speaking.

An example is: “Hello,” Abby said. “Abby said” is a tag.

Dialog tags are in the writer’s domain.

Tags belong to the voice of the writer. It is the writer who is providing tags not the character. The character has spoken—and we hope she has done so in a manner that moves the story along—in the dialogue, the author want us to know which character had spoken and does so in the writer’s voice. “Abby said” comes from the lips of the author and not from those of the speaker.

We want to hear the characters speak in a memoir.

The characters are the author at a younger age or some other character that the author has brought to the fore to say something. Characters speak in the dialog.

Tags are not the character’s but the author’s, and dialog tags are not about bringing the author to the foreground. No, the author needs to remain in the background, inconspicuous.

This is not to say that we will dismiss the author or that we do not care about him. (When I say author, I am distinguishing between the version of the person who is a character in your story—which is set in the past—and the person who is at this moment keyboarding the story in the present.)

As a result of wanting the author to be present but in the background, I believe it is necessary to make tags nondescript. Generally, tags need little words and not big words. In this way, it is the character’s dialog and not the writer’s attribution that is in the forefront.

What I recommend for dialog tags are nondescript words:

• he said
• she shared
• he answered
• she replied

These tags do not bring attention to themselves and they keep the reader focused on what the character said in the dialog and not on the tag.

Dialog tags are not rocket science.

In offering these words, I am not being proscriptive. I am merely trying to help you to stay on the reader’s good side. There are other words, of course, that you could use to good effect, and sometimes you may want variety. When you do opt for variety, remember that it is not time for you to parade of your extensive vocabulary.

When we do parade our vocabulary, we write, “he chortled” or “she reposted.” We might even use “he squalled,” “she bleated,” “he sniveled,” she yowled,” “he tittered,” “she chuckled.”

Using this variety of vocabulary, the author indulges in being the center of attention. This takes the attention away from the character, and the reader is either impressed with the variety of the author’s vocabulary or is put out with her. In either case, the character loses out.

Remember: as you choose alternatives to “he said” and “she said,” be vigilant not to slip into unusual words. Not only do unusual words bring attention to the tags themselves as opposed to the dialog, they make you sound funny. Here are examples:

• she opined
• he orated

None of this is to say that an extensive vocabulary need be a problem, but your extensive vocabulary is better reserved for the narrative. Even there, vocabulary ought to be chosen for precision and not show.

If you have the least inkling that a word will stop the intelligent reader, you would do well to replace that word. (This is not to encourage you not to challenge the reader a bit, but you should not bring the reader to a full stop as he reads your story.)

What is important in a piece of dialogue is what the character of your memoir has said. That dialogue itself ought to contain all the information you need to advance the story.

You might have written, “Kami, I love you but I refuse to continue to tolerate your behavior. This makes me sad,” he lamented.

Now the dialogue contains all the info that you need and the tag “lamented” is not bad but it is not necessary as the sense of “lament” is evident in the dialog.

You might equally, and correctly, have written:

• he said.
• he responded

You do not always have to use a dialog tag.

When there are only two characters in a scene, you can have them speak to each other without a tag. Generally you can do about three exchanges before I would recommend you add a tag. The tag informs the reader once again as to who is speaking. After the new tag, the dialog can now continue for a few more exchanges without confusing the reader.

Now, Hemingway used to do lengthy exchanges without tags, but I have always thought this to be confusing and have often found myself trying to connect who said what when I read Hemingway. I find his long dialog without tags to be difficult to read. I wouldn’t recommend you indulge in this bad habit.

Tags also become unnecessary when the preceding sentence is a set up. For example: “The boy looked straight at the principal. ‘Do you have time to speak to me about what happened?’” We certainly know who is speaking.

Alternately, the dialog can contain an unmistakable allusion. For example: “The boy looked straight at the principle. ‘Sir, do you have time to speak to me?’ ”

In Conclusion

I hope this has been helpful.

If you would like to explore receiving help with your dialog tags—or any aspect of memoir writing, we offer a 30-minute complimentary get-to-know-you coaching consultation.

Good luck writing dialog tags into your stories!